How to Diplomatically Interact with Assisted Living Facility Personnel

October 31, 2024

Knowing how to communicate effectively with the caregivers responsible for your loved one’s safety and well-being will help to ensure they are receiving the best possible care. Here’s how to deal with assisted living staff, keep the lines of communication open, and build mutual trust.

Introduce Yourself

From the moment you start interacting with the facility, introduce yourself to staff and let them know you will be actively engaged with your loved one’s care. Get to know staff members by name. Greet them and ask after them each time you visit. Positive reinforcement is an effective strategy for building trust, so let them know they are appreciated. Be polite and empathetic, even when you have concerns.

Make Your Presence Felt

Be proactive about engaging with the community. Try to visit at various times of day so you can monitor care standards on different shifts. 


Show Up for Care Plan Meetings

A plan of care is the overall strategy for how staff intend to help a resident. Depending on the needs of the resident and the policies of the facility, care plan meetings will take place at regular intervals, but at least once every three months. The meetings are designed for residents, staff, and families to discuss details of life in the facility, such as social activities, meals, and medical care/therapies. A representative from each department will field questions from you and your loved one, and take input with a view to providing better care. Being present and prepared for these meetings provides a key opportunity to raise concerns and strengthen your relationship with staff. Taking notes will help you keep track of what is discussed.


Ask Questions

Whether at the care plan meeting or during a visit, asking direct, specific questions about your loved one’s experiences will help you understand how effectively the facility is accomplishing the goals set out in the care plan. Areas to focus on and key questions to ask include:

  • Sleep patterns. Is my loved one sleeping well? What time do they wake up and go to bed? Do those times vary? Are they waking up during the night?
  • Exercise. What kinds of exercise are they getting? Is it enough?
  • Food and drink. Are they eating regularly? Do they finish their meals? Do they complain of hunger? Are they drinking enough water?
  • Medication. Is their medication regimen oriented to their needs? Should they change any medication, and why?
  • Social life. Is my loved one making friends and being social? Who do they spend time with? Do they spend long periods of time alone?
  • General well-being. Do they seem generally happy and content? Have they exhibited any strange behavior or said anything that is a cause for concern?

Aside from keeping you informed, engaging staff with these questions can help to establish and consolidate your rapport, and maintain an ongoing dialogue.

Take Notes

Whenever possible, keep a written record of concerns, observations and questions regarding your loved one’s care. A dedicated notebook or folder can help you keep track of details like weight loss. Your notes may be invaluable in the event you need to substantiate concerns at a later date. 


Know When to Escalate

Some minor issues may be resolved through direct conversation with staff members. This is where the work of rapport-building and proactive involvement pays off. If your concerns relate to the physical or psychological safety of the resident, they should be raised immediately with the Administrator. If you feel your concerns are not being taken seriously, or you are not confident of a resolution, the next step is to contact the Long Term Care Ombudsman and/or the Department of Health. See here for more information on reporting elder abuse in assisted living facilities.

Talk to an Assisted Living Attorney

If you suspect that your loved one has experienced elder abuse in an assisted living facility, consider contacting an elder abuse attorney with experience in this type of litigation. You may be eligible to receive compensation for the harm caused. To schedule a free consultation with an assisted living attorney in California, fill out a contact form or call our offices.

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